The Bucket list by 30 – how to deal when you don’t reach it.

Turning thirty is a pretty big deal and i personally don’t know why we put more pressure on ourselves to accomplish all these grand things by thirty, when surviving your twenties is hard enough and reason enough to celebrate the next decade. With COVID19 taking the year of 2020 away from us, it is pretty impossible to leave the house, let alone reach any milestones we set.

I was getting married and divorced in my twenties, moving overseas and not to mention trying not to drown in debt while still living for each weekend. When i was researching the ’30 before 30′ i was shocked to see the lists; people had put down things like ‘travel to 30 states’, ‘adopt a puppy‘ and even ‘take a sabbatical’ I mean how are people meant to do all these things and work and survive financially and mentally!?

We struggle with keeping New Years resolutions and not to mention Australia is pretty far away from everywhere and expensive if you plan on travelling to every continent. The chances of completing the ’30 before 30′ challenge while still living your life is amazing if you can do it, but why beat yourself up if you don’t?

It doesn’t define you what you have accomplished by thirty because thirty isn’t the kind of milestone when you should have your shit together. Just ten years ago we were coming out from being a teenager, straight out of school and we’re supposed to have sorted everything out in the next ten years? The social stigma is that you should have done all these grand things, but who decided that?

What if you were in a relationship most of your twenties and then suddenly you’re single and life is starting again at 29? Are you meant to make a list and spend a year driving yourself crazy to do it?

You might have been in Uni for most of your twenties and couldn’t financially afford to leave your parents house let alone travel for six months around Europe.

We all know people who had children and married young so they certainly can’t go and spend every weekend doing bootcamps and trying every winery in the region. These expectations that we are putting on ourselves are attributing to the declining mental health of ourselves and our peers. I am not saying i don’t advocate for goals, I set myself goals every year – realistic goals that aren’t defined by a specific age.

A bucket list is brilliant, but have one that doesn’t make you feel inadequate if you don’t reach it or causes you to spend all your time and money focusing on achieving a list that you can still do in your thirties and be just as proud of.

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